Here’s more helpful advice from Karen Tierney at Studio Trousseau…

Finding a good seamstress is like finding a ‘good’ anything…doctor, car mechanic, masseuse, architect or piano teacher… It can be hit or miss so it’s good to start this process early. For alterations, at least 4 to 6 months before your wedding date if possible. Timing depends a lot on what needs to be done.  I’ve had to wait months to get fabric that I’ve requested from the manufacturer of a gown so it was perfectly matched.

There are as many different levels of craftsmanship as there are people so, again, it’s good to do your homework. The way people find my service is word-of-mouth and through a few stores that I do business with. Since much of what I do is restoration of vintage wedding gowns, the shop that refers brides to me is also a museum of lace and textiles called ‘Lacis.’  If you are ever in Berkeley, California check out this amazing store. They have many vintage wedding gowns and many supplies for brides, including the best selection of historic fashion books you could ever find in one place…as well as an abundance of other wonderful things. It’s like going into your grandmother’s attic…the grandmother who use to be the Grand Dam of high society…theater…or a collector of very cool stuff.

Everyone has a different idea about what sort of experience they want with a seamstress/dressmaker. It’s a bit difficult for me to be totally objective about this because I do this sort of work and I’ve made certain choices about how I do business based on my professional experiences, personality, standards … and the response I get from the brides I work with. I realize that not everyone wants or needs the level of attention that I give. So with this in mind, here is a list of options that you can pursue.

1. If you have a great relationship with your local laundry, you can ask them to do it.  I hesitate to recommend this option (I fully realize that there are exceptions) because I’ve had to repair so much damage done by cleaners. So as a rule, I tend not to recommend them.

2. Businesses that advertise as alteration specialists. Check out their references on Yelp and Angie’s list.

3. Ask at local wedding gown salons. They usually have dressmakers that they work with.

4. Nice clothing stores or the high end clothing sections of department stores sometimes have outside vendors they work with and are willing to give out their names.

5. Unique shops like the one I mentioned above, have people they work with.

6. If you get a vintage gown, a shop or dealer that sells them might have or are seamstresses.

7. Ask your mom, sister, friends and great aunt Peg who they have worked with.

8. Talk to other brides in your area that you know.

9. Ask the other wedding related companies like wedding planners, hair stylists, or photographers if they have a recommendation. I recently went to an open house for a wedding location that was featuring all of the vendors they use and they wanted me to be apart of the services they offered.

10. Wedding trade shows often have seamstresses represented.

11. My favorite option would be fine fabric stores. They typically keep a file of good seamstresses. This is an option that would yield someone who would probably give you personal attention and have fine craftsmanship.

These are in no particular order and I’m sure there are more, but this is a good start.

Angie’s list and Yelp are good resources to find out what kind of experience others have had with each business. They seem to be the next step past word-of-mouth. All in all it’s been my experience that the best relationships really are from personal recommendations.

Now, when you find a few that you like, I think it’s best to take the time to go and meet with them personally with your dress. There is usually no charge for the first meeting with a seamstress. You are going to be entering into a pretty close relationship with this person over many months so you need to feel really comfortable and you can’t know this without meeting them face to face. This gives you a chance to see their studio, look at their portfolio, ask how they keep track of their time and run their business. Are they professional but easy to talk to? Are they thoughtful, focused on you and have ideas and options to offer?

In all fairness, you can’t really ask them to give you a cost estimate over email or on the phone. You may ask their hourly rate, get a sense of their personality and ask for references if you don’t already have them, but that’s about it. Every dress and every body that goes into it are different. It’s impossible to determine what has to be done and how long it will take until you see the dress on the body.  Even then, you can only give a ballpark figure. Dresses with a lot of internal structure, like strapless gowns with built-in corsets, sometimes have 4 to 6 layers that also have to be taken a part, altered and reassembled so it looks and feels good. A seamstress can’t know this until they actually open up the gown. Retro fitting (as I refer to it) is often more complex than making the gown originally because putting it all back together correctly requires a lot of hand work. I charge for time and materials because working with a bride is a process and the projects tend to grow as we go along.

There are a lot of ways to work with a seamstress too. You can work with them getting advice on questions you may have before you get a gown. They may have questions that you wouldn’t think to ask. An example: does the gown have any extra fabric that comes with it?… especially if the gown is smaller than you. If they are design oriented, they can help you make a choice between gowns, and give you ideas about what to wear with them. This goes past just being a seamstress and you should be willing to compensate them for their consulting time.

The Bridezilla question: I’ve had many people ask me if I have had any ‘bridezillas’ and I have to say no. All the brides that I have worked with are very polite, respectful and appreciate the fact that I am going to play a big part in making them look their very best on their wedding day.

The most difficult brides I’ve worked with are ones that can’t make a decision and after hours of back and forth emails and phone calls, they decide to do something else altogether. So being prepared and willing to make choices is always a more efficient way to go about this process for all involved.

I’ve discovered something very special about being someone’s seamstress/dressmaker. It’s a very sweet and close relationship and we get to know each other very well. It’s very positive and happy and I try to put that kind of energy into the work.  Many brides are pretty stressed out with all the wedding plans, but when they come to me, I want the dress to be the least of their worries and leave here feeling good and wearing a big smile.  Perhaps this is an assumption on my part, but I would like to think that all brides would want this sort of experience.

As a closing note:

I’ve seen this over and over…on the day of a bride’s final fitting when they come up the stairs to my studio and see their completed gown on the dress form, it’s usually very emotional because when the dress is finished, suddenly it all becomes very real.  So check to see if they have a tissue box handy!

Karen’s Next Post: Options and considerations for the gown that is too big for you.

About: Karen Tierney of Studio Trousseau specializes in restoration, alterations of vintage to modern wedding gowns, custom gowns and corsets in the San Francisco Bay Area. With a background in historic costuming, Karen can offer many options to make the gown unique to you using attention to detail and traditional french tailoring.

Karen is a regular contributor to the PreOwnedWeddingDresses.com blog.  You can find all of her expert advice in our Alterations section.

Danielle and Max were married in September 2007 at the Tobacco Warehouse, under the Brooklyn Bridge in DUMBO – Brooklyn, New York. With such a picturesque setting, it is no wonder their photography is as beautiful as it is. And Danielle and Max truly planned the wedding together, making it that much more about the two of them.

Here’s a bit about the wedding in Danielle’s words.

How you knew he was the one:
I felt I’d known him forever – he made me laugh – feel so confident and comfortable and just simply happy.

Ceremony:
Our ceremony combined our cultural mix – with elements borrowed from Jewish and Christian tradition, and with so much friend and family support.

Reception:
The reception was an awesome party!  Our wedding location was pretty spectacular, under the Brooklyn Bridge in an amazing space. Our cocktail hour was outside, and the dinner/dancing was under a huge tent. We had toasts before dinner, then dinner, and then dancing for the rest of the night. I don’t think anyone sat down after dinner – a blast! We had a mix of DJ/i-pod music that worked really well.

Favorite detail about the reception:
Our tables. We named our tables after special places in our lives together – and placed a photograph of the place on each table, with a description. Also, my mother is a talented ceramic artist – and one amazing gift she gave us was making the centerpieces for each table – gorgeous wood fired pottery that held our flowers.

Advice for other brides:
I was so lucky that I had a fiance who was thrilled to engage in the planning process. There are so many stereotypes about “shutting up and showing up” for the groom – but if you can, work together! We had so much fun planning our wedding – and were able to bring in so many personal elements from both of our lives. Make it as personal as you can.

Danielle’s wedding dress: Monique Lhuillier Melania
Photography by: Zach DeSart

Since I haven’t had too many pressing things to do on my agenda, I’ve been searching for jewelry to go with my dress. Hey, there’s no better time than now to get it taken care of, right? Look, my thinking is, why wait until I have fifteen thousand other things on my plate to purchase my jewelry? I have the dress, so I’ll go ahead and buy the accessories to go with it.

Now, I had always wanted to wear pearls–either a necklace or earrings or both–, but now I’m wondering how feasible that is. My dress is so simple that pearls would just look boring on it, I think. The problem is, I’m not exactly the queen of accessorizing an outfit, so maybe what I’m doing is all wrong! But I think that an interesting pop of jewelry will be good.

My new favorite website is etsy.com, because everything is so amazingly unique and awesome and handcrafted, and most things are very reasonably priced. There’s even a special wedding category with suggestions! Here is the necklace that I found, from the user ellejewels.

Just a few weeks ago (have I written about this already?) I was in Borders with Jarrod, and I picked up a pencil case and admired the design on it. “You like birds, don’t you?” Jarrod asked, and I realized at that moment that I really do like designs with birds on them. I mean, I’m not like, a huge real-life bird fan. I don’t memorize bird calls or anything. But for some reason, I really like stylized birds. And so that’s a huge thing in this necklace.

Now the problem I face is, what do I put with it? I could get these lily earrings to match the necklace, but I feel like that would be too matchy. Maybe some sort of beaded pretty things? I don’t know. And would a necklace, earrings, and bracelet be overkill? I’m not planning on having a handbag at all. Hey, if you have any suggestions for me, by all means comment! I really like feedback on my ideas, mostly because I’m an indecisive person who weighs pros and cons of things, and then can’t make up her mind. Politically, I am a moderate–no surprise there!

Anyway, I’ve got time to ruminate. But we’re coming up on the halfway point to our engagement! That’s very exciting news to me. I’m ready to be married.

Since I started this site in 2004, I’ve seen buying and selling  preowned wedding dresses  develop from something almost unheard of, to something with a growing understanding, acceptance and desirability.  I’d venture to say that (compliments of the economy and global warming) at least half of women have considered buying preowned or selling post wedding.  It just makes sense.

Priscilla of Boston Pre-Sale. Wedding: September 19, 2009

My favorite analogy: if you bought a $90,000 car and owned it for 1 year, the cost breaks down to 17 cents a minute.  If you bought a $5,000 wedding dress and wore it for 5 hours, the cost is $16.67 a minute.   Whoa.

Another development I’ve seen recently is the idea of pre-selling a wedding dress. At first I couldn’t really get my head around it, but I think it has definitive merit.  Here’s why.

A  pre-sell a wedding dress, can be altered with “pre-sale in mind.”  This means that the seamstress leaves some fabric in the dress/hem for it to be re-sized later.   She also can save any extra fabric, which might also be useful when the gown is altered again.

Pre-sell brides will also wear the dress with resale in mind.  Just a little extra care everywhere so the gown will be in its best used condition.

A pre-sell gown also gets to the new buyer soon after the original wedding.  So it only needs to be cleaned, not preserved (a saved expense).

And a “pre-buyer” knows the gown she wants will be available on a certain date.  And she knows it will fit because it was altered with her measurements in mind.

A good friend of mine, Elizabeth, recently pre-sold her (very, very expensive) wedding dress.  It helped her justify the expense knowing that she had already found a buyer for after the wedding.  And her buyer was dead in love with the dress and very close to her in size, but couldn’t afford it new.  So it worked out very well for both of them.

If you look up “stock option” on investopedia, it says “A privilege, sold by one party to another, that gives the buyer the right, but not the obligation, to buy or sell  a stock at an agreed-upon price within a certain period or on a specific date.”

My friend Elizabeth’s arrangement is essentially the same thing.  Her buyer isn’t obligated to buy her dress, but she knows when she will get the chance to, before anyone else.

If you are thinking about “pre”, here are some things to consider:

As a pre-buyer, you need to be sure the timing allows for you to have a back up plan. (Think, God forbid, a drunk groomsman and a glass of red wine).  And be sure to discuss all terms of the sale upfront (price, payment method, who pays for the original cleaning).  Ironing out these details early will ensure there are no surprises later.

As a pre-seller, put yourself in the buyer’s shoes.  It isn’t reasonable to expect she give you a deposit for a gown whose condition can’t be guaranteed. (Although if both sides agree to the terms of a deposit, it can be done).

If you have thoughts or experiences with pre buying or selling, I’d love to hear them.  Is this a trend whose time has come?